Many people who have fibromyalgia also suffer from some form of anxiety and depression. To me it’s only logical if a person is in almost constant pain and basically has their life taken away from them they will be depressed. I’ve tried every medicinal, thereputical, and homeopathical remedy for this and found a good balance that works for me. (See? I even had to make up new words I’ve tried so many treatments.) I’ve also had to develop basic coping skills so I can nip the anxiety before it disables me for days. I’m not a scientist but what I think happens with me personally is when I get really sick it goes like this:

Body to brain: We are on fire.

Brain: That is no good I’ll fix it.

Body: It didn’t work.

Brain: Fire! Fire! Here is now a long list of everything that is wrong in my life with the worst possible conclusion because maybe one of those things is causing the fire.

One of the things that helps me most after the medicines and homeopathic treatments is simply knowing my limits. If I get too tired my emotions slide in a matter of seconds. It’s my body’s way of saying that I don’t like this, get me out, even though I can’t get out of fibromyalgia. So instead, I just have to push myself…but not too hard.

On August 28th is the anniversary of when I got sick. At last I think it’s that day. I used to get really depressed around this time of year, thinking of everything that I’ve lost. Now I can hardly remember if it’s been 14 or16 years. (Pretty sure it’s 15). For some reason I started thinking about what it would be like if it were a real anniversary. I’d send out holiday invitations and invite my friends and family. Maybe I’ll just settle for buying myself a present. The 15th anniversary symbol is crystal, so maybe a ring, a chandelier, or some candlestick.s If only fibro-versaries were as fun and such a symbol of accomplishment.

Today is a normal pain day. I’m actually really excited about this. It’s been snowing all week. You can laugh if you want to, I would if it hadn’t happened to me. That also means it’s been cloudy & I haven’t seen the pretty, pretty sun. Last Saturday was a particularly bad day for fatigue & pain. I would’ve blogged about it but that would have required moving. It was one of those days when I kept thinking “Why is the bathroom so far away?” It made me realize how much I do have.

Yes, fibromyalgia keps me from scaling Mount Everest. That would probably be scary so I don’t really mind. Yes, I’m sick. However, there are a lot of times when I pick up the laundry hamper without noticing it. There are even more times when I walk around the house without counting steps or thinking about it. There are a lot of things that fibromyalgia has kept me from doing, but even more things that I can do that I just never even notice.