I often get discouraged because I can’t help out as much as I want too. I’m one of the few people I know that would love to be able to wash the dishes every night & do all the housework. However, with fibromyalgia, that would be all I could do in a day & I’d be sick for several days afterwards. So I do the light cleaning, & feel guilty. Then I get overwhelmed thinking about everything I can’t do, all the ways I wish I could help people but simply can’t. I’ve noticed that most people feel this way, especially with really big problems like world hunger. My dad always told me, you can’t do everything, but you must do something.
One of the biggest things that I’ve learned is the power of encouragement. I can’t clean the heavy pots, but I can sit in a chair & talk to whoever is doing the dishes, & try to make the time go by faster. I know what it’s like to be tired, so I can recognize this in other people. By no means was I the cheerleader type in school, I’m just not very peppy, & that still hasn’t changed. However, I am easily impressed when I see someone wearing shoes, or working in the yard. So I compliment them & encourage them, even though it’s a little thing. I used to say, people don’t clap when I walk anymore. When I learned to walk, people would always clap, the way they do for all toddlers. However, it’s even more difficult for me now sometimes, & no one claps, or even notices. So one of the biggest ways that I’m trying to help people is by encouraging them, even though I’m not the cheerleader type.
Some time it’s hard to do things when nobody notices it. But I like encouragement. I think this is a wonderful parenting skill. sometimes it’s not always easy but as long as you keep it up I think it helps. I always try to encourage my wife too. she works so hard and sometimes she feel down so that’s when i know she needs some extra encouragement.
Todd
I have fibromyalgia too.
Wow, the more I read on this the more I think this is my problem. I am the same way, if I clean really god one day, I am recuperating for the next 4. I always have an ache here and a pain there, tired, etc.
I will have insurance in the next month or so and I am going straight to the doc. Is there any medicines that help you?
Hi - I don’t have fibro but I do have IBS, I know a lot of folks have both together. I know what you mean when you say no-one claps or even notices, even when you’re doing things that for you are really tough.
I often think that coping with my IBS has been far harder then finishing school or getting a job or passing my driving test, or any thing that people have actually given me credit for!
Anyway, I’d like to give you a virtual clap for this blog apart from anything else and for your efforts to encourage others. good on you!
I was diagnosed with Fibro 3 years ago and I was brought to tears reading your entry. The tears are from relief that there is at least one other person in this world that understands more than just the physical pain of Fibro but the emotional pain of not being able to do simple normal daily tasks like washing dishes. I am so thankful that I have an amazing husband who will do anything to help me have a “better” day including do dishes, laundry, running errands, etc.
Thank you again for the time & precious energy that you put forth to write this blog. You can add me to your list of loyal readers.